Growing up, I never really had a relationship with God. I began to experiment with alcohol and drugs in high school. I got a job at a pharmacy and went to college. During this time, I got to see the effects of addiction up-close through a relationship I was in. I watched his withdrawals, so I began stealing meds to help him. It wasn’t long before I daily began snorting pain medicine. I would steal for personal use, but also to sell in college. With all the money I obtained, I kept using and completely wrecked my life. I was unrecognizable even to myself.
Before I knew it, I was a full-blown addict that couldn’t live, sleep, or function without drugs. I quit college, my job, and my relationship to move back home. After a 30-day rehab at my parents’ wishes, I was back out there – now worse than before. However, this time I was injecting and became pregnant. My baby ended up in NICU due to the drugs in his system. I’ve never felt so hopeless.
Shortly after, I came to the Women of Hope. I completed the program, but after entering into a new relationship I started using again. Eventually, I became pregnant again with twins while I was taking Subutex. They were delivered healthy, but after their first year I discovered a new evil: methamphetamine. I spiraled out of control. For over a year, I was trapped in a cycle of trying to find my next high, a place to lay my head, and a meal to fill my stomach.
I came back to Women of Hope and this time has been different because I fully surrendered my life into God’s hands. I have more peace than I’ve ever had. I don’t worry about what the future holds because I know that God is in control. Since I’ve been here, God has been restoring my relationship with my family and I get to see my kids often. I teach praise dance to the girls in the center which is a huge passion of mine. I now know my worth and I know that He has a purpose for my life. I know God loves me despite my past and my mistakes. He has made a way for me even when I thought there was no way. Because Christ died for me, I will live for Him.